Last night we got a call at about 12:30am that they were going to intubate Jaxson. They said due to him having so many episodes and that he was also choking on his saliva that he was regurgitating from his stomach due to the CPAP they wanted to be cautious and give him a break from working so hard. This was very hard for us to take because it's like taking several steps back. I stayed up until they were done working on him and talked to the nurse about 3am to make sure he was ok, slept a few hours and then called at 6 to check on him again. They said he was resting and handling the ventilator well.
Chris woke up early and drove back up here to be with me and Jaxson since we didn't really know what was going on. We went up to the hospital at 9am but had to wait an hour to see him since they were doing blood work and the doctors were doing their rounds. It was very hard for me to see him on the ventilator and took me a few minutes to walk up to him. Of course the tears just started rolling but I knew I needed to pull it together for my son. The doctor came up and talked to us for a few minutes and showed us how many episodes he had been having the night before and said they were still running tests. We spent a little longer with Jaxson and then went to a room down the hall in the hospital to rest since neither of us had really slept. When I went back to sit with Jaxson a little while later they said the results of his brain scan were back and the doctor wanted to talk with us.
The results from the test showed that Jaxson had been having small seizures. Of course this was very scary to hear. He said it could be caused by one of two things. One, it's just a normal preemie thing or two, he could have a very serious virus. The hard part it is takes 5 days for the results to come back to find out if he has that virus.
For now they have stopped his feedings and are keeping him on the ventilator. They have started anti-viral medication just to be safe and have started him on anti-seizure medication as well.
The one good thing today was that I spoke with another couple who's son is in the NICU as well and the same thing happened to them. They said it was very scary to hear but their son didn't have the virus and was doing just fine.
Jaxson is still doing good on the ventilator and he still kicks and squirms when bothered and that's a good sign. When we sit with him we are trying to talk to him and tell him we are there with him and that he is doing a good job.
I never dreamed this would be so hard, with all the emotions it is totally and completely exhausting and I can't believe it's been 4 weeks since Jaxson was born. Today I walked out of the NICU for about the 4th time and thought, "this almost feels like a dream." I feel like I'm walking around in a haze, in my own dream not really aware of the rest of the world around me.
Hopefully tomorrow will be a better day. Your prayers and support are very much appreciated.
A special thanks to both of our companies for being so understanding and supportive.
Hi Kasey,
ReplyDeleteI went to high school with your husband - my youngest son was not born premature but he needed emergency surgery exactly 2 years ago today and was within hours of death. He then spent 10 days in the NICU (which seemed like an eternity then but compared to so many others - it's nothing) which was the hardest thing we've ever been through. We did the whole morphine thing which made him "forget" to breathe a couple of times. It just sucks to have your baby in the NICU and feel so helpless! :( It's definitely a rollercoaster, too.
Anyway, I hope today is a better day for all of you. I'll keep you in my prayers - and I'll pray for the seizures to be caused by the normal preemie issues. I think he's gonna be just fine! My little Easton turned two last week and is doing great! I hope Jaxson progresses quickly and grows like a little weed so he can go home ASAP!!! Take care - you have lots of prayers coming your way!!
:) Wendy (Gibson) Oborne